Friday, December 13, 2013
I started my first year at ECU back in August and I can't believe that I'm done with one semester. AND I'm not failing anything! Crazy right?
I initially lost 10 lbs when I first got to school but I gained it back. I'm slowly taking it off the right way (I followed the "Paleo" diet the first time). I'm also learning to love myself and to realize my own self worth. I'm a prize and people need to see that. If they don't, then they aren't worth MY time.
Saturday, May 25, 2013
Side note: My ankle is getting better, I believe. I can bear more weight on it. I've also been lifting more, which is exciting. I'm not sure when the results will start to show, but it can't be too long. Or maybe it can. I don't know. Either way, I won't give up on it.
Wednesday, May 22, 2013
After long contemplation, I've come to the conclusion of something. While I have a blog, I think I want to document my progress in a larger, more accessible form. I want to write a book. Well, an extensive memoir, I suppose. I know I need to start now, which I will. I will write until I hit my goal size/weight. I feel that doing this will not only help me close a very large (haha, "large." I'm punny) chapter of my life. I'm not sure where to start but I definitely know where I want to go with it. All I have to do is start.
Friday, May 17, 2013
Thursday, May 9, 2013
Wednesday, May 8, 2013
Yesterday afternoon, I delivered 2 items to Dale which I think officially closes that chapter in my life. I gave him back a ring he gave me and a GPS. I sincerely apologized for the awful things I said and hopefully from here I can move forward.
Also: I have decided, after long deliberation, I would like to become a pescetarian or vegetarian (but the healthy kind, not the "I'm-Gonna-Eat-Everything-I-See-That-Doesn't-Contain-Meat" kind). I've been wanting to do this for a while and I've have a few feeble attempts. But they were just, well, attempts. I actually want to commit to this. (:
I also took the time to figure out why I want to lose weight. Since I've had limited mobility due to my ankle, it has given me a chance to think. Some of my reasons may be superficial, but hey, they're mine. The reasons go as follows:
1) Health: My family has a history of health problems related to poor diet and I don't want to follow the same path.
2) College major: I (currently) aspire to be a nutritionist and athletic trainer. I should be an example.
3) Acceptance: Now, I know what you're thinking, but it isn't to be accepted by others. I've NEVER been comfortable in my own skin and while confidence comes from within, I feel that learning to love myself, both physically and emotionally, would be a life changing experience.
4) Clothes and money: Okay, lemme break it down: The larger the clothes are, the more a person pays because of added fabric. Losing weight will save me money, as well as finding me some new clothes.
Someone told me that my blog isn't hitting the "goal" of it. By that I mean, they don't believe it focuses on weight loss, but other factors. This post is an effort to change that. (:
Saturday, April 20, 2013
Honestly, I've been wanting to do this for ages. I want to participate in The Color Vibe 5K in June. Basically, you register and when the day comes, you do your 5k. The fun part is while you run (or walk/jog/roll, whatever), you are blasted with paint powder by the volunteers and bystanders at the end of the race, you have a color explosion.
The thing is, I've never trained for one. SO. I am going to start. I have no idea how, but I'm going to. I think I'm going to download an app for it. Zombies, Run! 5K seems to be intriguing. It isn't free, but it's only like, 2 bucks on the Android Market thingy. Either way, I'm excited to do it.
Saturday, April 13, 2013
What do I want in someone:
Educated (consistently): We're talking like, aspiring to go to higher levels of education
Ambitious: Have a plan with what you want to do. Please.
Kind: Be nice overall
Respectful: Respect me, my friends, and my family. Don't talk about hooking up with other people while you're in a relationship with me. I will not react well.
Insightful and interactive: I like to talk. A lot. I don't want to have a conversation with someone who won't talk or does not have anything to talk about.
Initiator: Text or call me sometimes. Plan dates. I won't do all the work.
Makes time for me (and enjoys my company): I know everyone is busy, but it isn't that hard to make time for your girlfriend sometimes and ENJOY when she is around instead of saying they come over too much (2 or 3 days out of the week.
Preferably active: I like to be active so if you sit on your ass, I will run right past you.
Communicative: If there are problems, we talk about it.Point blank.
Affectionate: If we are serious, a little PDA doesn't hurt. Holding hands can be fun if you make it.
Dedicated: Don't. Cheat. On. Me.
Preferably employed: I don't mind spending on my significant other, but it's good to have cash in your own pocket
Spontaneous: I love spontaneity. No, I don't expect flowers or concert tickets (though, those are nice), but a nice hug from behind is always appreciated.
Loves me FOR me: If you can handle my emotions, randomness, outgoing and vibrant attitude and affection, you're golden.
Now, don't get me wrong, Dale did many of these things. But he didn't do them to a standard to which I find appropriate. I deserve 100% if that's what I'm putting out. Kay? Kay. I will no longer settle.
Monday, April 8, 2013
Well regardless, weight loss is hard. And slow. And potentially frustrating. In fact, something in me just did NOT want to work out at all. No idea what it was. Probably my allergies. They tend to drain the life out of me. I did go, though. I made a commitment that since Dale and I broke up that I'd do what makes me happy. Working out makes me happy, even if I don't want to do it at the time. Afterwards, I felt pretty damn good. I think this hair cut is something I needed. I can't "hide" anymore, not like my hair before made me able to do so. But I think my haircut has empowered me to put a bit more effort into my looks (at least for a little while). I've lost nearly 60 pounds and that deserves to be seen, you know? I think so, anyway. I have a little figure showing, but it's not where I want to be yet. Unfortunately, it's getting hot and my shorts no longer fit. I'm proud of my progress though.
Sunday, April 7, 2013
So I'm now single and in debt. Marvelous. I shouldn't use my weight loss as a weapon. I shouldn't lose weight to spite him or make him "want me," but that is the one thing that IS keeping me going. Someone told me that I need to do some self searching to see why I want to lose weight. They said when I figure that out, regardless of my life situations, I'd constantly stay motivated and when I'm happy with myself, people around me would gravitate toward me and feed off of my personal happiness. Thing is, I've not yet discovered what that internal motivation is. Perhaps on the next blog (god forbid not in the next 3 weeks), I would have discovered it. But for now, it's time for bed. It's the final quarter of my senior year and I'm determined to end it right.
Sunday, March 24, 2013
On a happy note, I've lost even more weight lately. I'm not entirely sure how much, but I know I have because my clothes fit differently now. I broke my iPod so I've been lazy on the working out aspect, but I'm back on the horse. I tend to fall off the work out wagon a lot, but I never turn my back up to it. I always chase it again.
One last happy thing, I got another job. I'm now a calligraphy tutor at a local tattoo parlor. I'm so excited!
Wednesday, March 13, 2013
Sunday, March 10, 2013
Saturday, March 9, 2013
Friday, March 8, 2013
Wednesday, March 6, 2013
There is something many people don't know about me. In fact, my parents don't even know..until now. I've battled bulimia since September, 2012. I've kept it under wraps other than a small circle of friends, but if I'm going to open up about my weight loss journey, this needs to be known. I don't want "pity," nor do I want to be looked at differently, although I might be. This is not something to easily open up about and it isn't easy to overcome. There comes a time when you do something enough, you become accustomed to it. That's how my body reacts when I eat. My brain will say "purging is a stupid idea, what is wrong with you," but my body reads it as "I need to be thin in order to be happy, therefore I must puke this up." Now, I KNOW being thin will not make me happy. Loving myself will make me happy. Loving others and letting them love ME will make me happy. It took me a while to acknowledge that and I'm working to fix it everyday. This is an uphill battle every time I'm faced with a meal option, but I know I'm strong. If I can let go of 50+ pounds, I can kick this terrible, terrible habit. People need to come to terms with we are all faced with something we dislike about ourselves; something we want to improve upon. I say go for it. Fix what you need to fix in order to be pleased and fulfilled not only with your current decision, but your life as well. However, one must do it wisely and in a healthy way. It has took me a little over half a year to see that and I work through it every day. I just want to be the best Kassie I can.
Tuesday, March 5, 2013
Sunday, March 3, 2013
This is my work out routine. On the days I don't work out, I will be swimming:
Bench press- 3x10
Rows (which is better: barbell or dumbbell)- 3x10
Lat Pull down- 3x10
Shoulder press- 3x10
Lat raises- 3x10
Leg press- 3x10
Back extension- 3x10
Ab exercises- Varies
Negative Pulls Ups (I've yet to master Pull Up)- 3x10
Push ups- Varies
Cable Row- 3x10
Dumbbell flyes- 3x10
Saturday, March 2, 2013
So I came back and what did I find? My best friend, offering me half a burrito (which I DID eat), and St. Patty's day themed cuppycakes. Now, I haven't had a cupcake in months so heck yeah I ate it. And it was delicious. Work was pretty standard and went by rather quickly. My beau is in Sanford so I didn't get to hang out with him after work ):< But it's all good.
Dinner consisted of Reuben sandwiches. I did not log everything I at today, but meh. Someone DID comment on my weight loss and told me I was "lookin' good." That made me happy. It's comments like that, that encourage me to continue doing what I'm doing. I also gave weight loss advice to someone (:
On a more sour note: I EFFIN' HATE SHELL GAS. I only have like, 8 dollars in my account. I spent 6 on gas, but I think it withdrew more than that. I am furious. I don't get paid until this Friday, I have no money, little gas, and a very pissy mood.